This is a great quote from the movie, Bridemaids!
Too many times I was stuck in looking at the problems and everything that was going wrong in my life. Other people were not doing what I needed them to do to feel safe, secure and whole. Other people hurt me and used me. Even things such as finances. I blamed it all on others. I never took responsibility for “my part” in this endless cycle. Truthfully, I was stuck in the thinking that I didn’t have a part. As far as I was concerned, I was doing everything right.
I had to come to the place of understanding that I did have a part. How I reacted to things and how I let them affect me were my parts. It took believing and respecting myself to realize that I was the one in control of my life, regardless of what happened or who hurt me. I am responsible for my thoughts and actions, or lack there of. I am responsible for the way I allow people to treat me. I have no control over how they treat me but I do have control to allow it or stand up for myself. I can stay in unhealthy relationships or I can walk away.
I could go on and on but I really don’t need to. If there is a problem in my life, I am the solution!
Journey On Strong 
Great quote (although I can’t say I was totally sold on the movie LOL….I think everyone liked it but me) I agree with you in that it has been easy to try and look to others as the fault in our brokenness but oh, how we have to take our own accountability. Then, and only then, do we see that we have much more control over our happiness and healing than we ever realized! 🙂
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Well said Chelise!
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So true. I’ve only realized this myself. I can’t let myself think I have no control over myself. I’ve yet to come as far as yourself though…
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Thank you for following my blog Miss Evelyn! You are the only one you have control over and sometimes we lose sight of that. Actually, I never had it to begin with and that is where my journey started. I wish you much growth, healing and strength on your journey…it’s not over yet!
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I didn’t have it in me either. I only discovered what codependency was but a few weeks ago. I didn’t know there was such a thing as codependency recovery. I wonder if they have that in my area. I’m trying my best. Thank you for sharing your story with us. It is truly inspiring. It helps to know im not alone nor the only crazy one.
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The program I attended was called Celebrate Recovery and ot is a Christian based recovery program for all hurts, hung-ups and habits. There are other programs out there as well like Coda. I have never attended a coda meeting but I hear it is a great program as well. Please contact me anytime if you have any questions or if you just need someone to listen.
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Thank you for listening to me, Ms. Ethel Duck. I feel like a broken record sometimes with the issues I have. Everyone tells me leaving is the only solution. I understand that but I cannot just pack up and go. I need to formulate some sort of plan and I also need to figure out how not to fall into the same pattern. Because I went from my mother to my husband.
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Set your mind to it and believe in yourself! You have so much value but you have to value yourself and KNOW that you deserve better and not settle. I know it’s hard but YOU CAN DO IT!
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Great lesson! I am still learning healthy boundaries and how to practice that whole self respect thing!
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That’s all we can do Breakdownchick…practice, practice, practice… It does get easier though!
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Good to know! I look forward to exploring more of your blog. Grateful to be connected!
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Thank you! I will be following your journey as well!
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Thank you 🙂 ❤
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