Encouragement for the Codependent
Secrets, Self-Sabotage Did you know that codependents keep secrets? Seriously, they do! Well, I did! Yep, they were deep, dark secrets that led to a whole lot of self-sabotage. Keeping those secrets helped to keep me down, locked in a prison in my own mind. Those secrets choked the life out of me. Other than... Continue Reading →
Rebound, Reliable Rebound - Going from one relationship to the next right away to avoid the pain of a breakup. One way I dealt with my feeling of hurt and betrayal was to rebound to the next relationship. So basically, I didn’t deal with them. For some reason, I could not be alone. Having someone,... Continue Reading →
Pusillanimous, Passive Aggressive I had an album when I was a teenager by the Rutles. I don’t remember where it came from but there was one song that always stuck with me, or should I say, one line from one song that always stuck with me; “You're so pusillanimous, oh yeah." I remember looking up... Continue Reading →
Manipulation, Minimize, Mask Do you realize that codependents are masters of manipulation? I had no idea! Let me tell you, learning that was like a blow to the gut. I did not like hearing that I was a manipulator (to control or play upon by artful, unfair, or insidious means especially to one's own advantage) but... Continue Reading →
Loathed, Lacked, Lost For me there is a great distinction between hate and loathe. I hate a lot of things and have even claimed to have hated some people from time to time (though I do not hang on to that burden long) but loathe is something all together different to me. Loathe is a... Continue Reading →
Knack, Kowtowing, Keelhauling, Knowing, Knee-jerk, Know I’m going to make this short and sweet. I had a knack (a tendency to do something) to kowtowing (act in an excessively subservient manner) knowing (done in full awareness or consciousness) that it wasn’t right or healthy for me and a knee jerk (automatic and unthinking) reaction to... Continue Reading →
Insecure, Individual, Isolation, Insanity Insecure - subject to fears, doubts, etc.; not self-confident or assured It’s not pleasant to remember how terribly insecure I used to be. Leave me alone for 10 minutes and I thought my life would end. Walk out that door and I worried you would never come back. Have a bad... Continue Reading →
Gullible, Guilt I use to be so gullible; I believed just about anything anyone would tell me. If Chicken Little would have told me, "the sky is falling", I would have been right there with him, running in circles and trying to save everyone. Somehow I believed that I was needed, wanted and loved based on... Continue Reading →
Denial, Delusional, Deceit, Debacle Oh good grief! When I started this little A-Z challenge I don't think I really thought it through well. I’m laughing at myself now because it’s only day 4 and who wants to admit these damn words? Delusional: having false or unrealistic beliefs or opinions - Yep, I had false and unrealistic beliefs of... Continue Reading →
Control, Care-taking, Communication I never thought I had any control issues. Nope, not me. But you see, control issues are sneaky little bastards. I thought everyone else had the issues and I was there to help and make it happen. If you were hungry, I fed you. If you were sad or angry, I tried to... Continue Reading →
Where did they come from? Why are they so powerful? What gives them power? There are many types of fears and some of them are quite valid but that is for another post. This post has to do with the silly fears developed in my younger years and are completely ridiculous for the woman I... Continue Reading →
Where do you get your affirmation? Most of my life I looked for affirmation from others. I needed to hear their words of praise, encouragement, love... I NEEDED it. I would receive compliments or praise and I would feel an ever so brief fluttering of pride. Then I would start feeling they didn't really mean... Continue Reading →
Journey On Strong 