This post expresses extremely foul language but it is the truth of where I am tonight - please do not read if it will offend you... I'm so angry tonight! It started off earlier today as shock and disbelief and as I rolled through the stages, once again, I have ended up here. I am... Continue Reading →
Bucket Listing My Future
It's kind of weird having so much freedom and time that I sometimes find myself wondering what to do from here. I've always had to consider someone else in the scope of my plans, not that I had many, but on occasion, I did have a few. These days, I am free to do whatever... Continue Reading →
Be the safe person…not the Judge!
I had an interesting conversation last night with a friend of mine who seems to feel another friend we have in common (though I haven't seen her for a few years) is "stuck" in her marriage. He went on to tell me how he basically interrogates her to see if she will tell the truth... Continue Reading →
How do I trust…myself again?
Looking back on my past and the chaos I created in my own life, I often wonder how am I ever going to trust myself again. Years of bad decisions and choices have, at times, left me completely and utterly discouraged at my own ability to discern what is best for me. I certainly can't... Continue Reading →
Nothing Changes If Nothing Changes
How many times have you heard the saying, "Nothing changes if nothing changes"? How about the definition of insanity: Doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result? Maybe you're like me, before I entered recovery, and have never heard these sayings before. Well, you have now so what are your thoughts? I... Continue Reading →
Having my day in court…VICTORY!
I woke up Wednesday feeling pretty at peace with myself and what was about to happen. It was finally the day to appear before the judge regarding the restraining order I had filed against my ex. I thought I had it all under control and this was going to be a breeze. It wasn't until... Continue Reading →
Wow! Who the heck is that?
Well here I am in all my glory. I can't argue that this is a beautiful picture so I won't even try. I am AMAZED. Trust me, I am not bragging or boasting and I am certainly not fishing for compliments. I have received so many on Facebook and I truly appreciate them all! I... Continue Reading →
Can’t help but focus on the blessings!
It's finally Friday! Whooo hooooo! I can't even begin to tell you of the stressful, yet amazing week I have had. It's almost like having an emotional and spiritual whiplash. I start to get down about the chaos around me, then, in an instant, my head spins at the amazing blessings God bestows on me through... Continue Reading →
The Journey is Yours
Straight up rambling tonight... It's been a long and windy road to get to the place of peace I live in today. I love my life and I love who I am today. Yes, there are days when my life is a bit chaotic and unsettled and times when I feel I am back-sliding into... Continue Reading →
Watching the Dance From Afar
One of the most frustrating things for a recovering codependent is to watch someone, who knows nothing of codependency, dance the endless and exhausting dance. It doesn't matter how much you explain what is happening on the dance floor, because you are all too familiar with it, they still dance. Once again reminding me, that... Continue Reading →
Protect me! She’s codependent!
One more step forward today. It's been a little rough trying to keep the guilt at bay, but I have managed. The restraining order has been filed and I will pick up the order tomorrow. It was hard, at first, then someone told me that "he" found out I was filing the restraining order and said... Continue Reading →
Tornado in the Valley of Change
Remember my last post, where I bragged about landing in the "Valley of Change"? Well, a tornado stuck the valley, full force, that very night. There was no warning; I never saw it coming. It hit so hard, I almost lost my sanity and peace of mind. Sleep did not come to me that night... Continue Reading →