Week 16: How I’ve Repaired Relationships Impacted by Codependency

How I’ve Repaired Relationships Impacted by Codependency (And a Few I Had to Peacefully Let Go)

If codependency were an Olympic sport, I would’ve medaled in the early 2000s. Back then, I thought being the “fixer” of every emotional emergency was just what strong, loving people do. Turns out, it was just me subconsciously clinging to chaos and control.

But here’s the good news: I’ve done a lot of unlearning, healing, laughing (and crying, let’s be real), and now I’m walking a healthier, happier path. On this blog—JourneyOnStrong.com—I’ve been sharing pieces of that journey, and today, I want to talk about how I’ve repaired some of those beautiful, complicated relationships… and gently released a few others.

1. The Art of the Awkward Apology

I used to believe that apologizing meant admitting I was entirely at fault—and my pride made that feel almost impossible. But over time, I’ve come to understand that a sincere apology isn’t about blame—it’s about taking responsibility for how I showed up, regardless of my intentions. Even when I meant well, my actions still impacted others.

In one conversation, I found the courage to say something like:

“I’ve been reflecting on how I showed up in our relationship, and I realize now that I was trying to control things in ways that weren’t fair to you. I truly thought I was helping, but I see now that I overstepped and didn’t give you the space you deserved. I’m deeply sorry for that.”

And in that moment, something shifted. There was honesty. Relief. Healing. It didn’t erase the past, but it allowed us to move forward with more understanding and grace.

2. Boundaries: The Unexpected Love Language

Boundaries used to feel like rejection. Now I see them as the ultimate form of respect—both for myself and for others.

In some cases, setting boundaries actually strengthened my relationships. Friends and family started trusting me more when I wasn’t over-functioning for everyone. I wasn’t draining myself or quietly resenting them anymore. (Win-win!)

I now say things like:

• “I’d love to help, but really can’t today.”
• “I’m not comfortable discussing that.”
• “Let me get back to you after I check in with myself.”

Growth? Wild.

3. Some Relationships Weren’t Meant to Be Repaired

This one stung. Some connections couldn’t come with me into this next chapter. Not because they were “bad people,” but because our dynamics were built on old habits I wasn’t willing to repeat.

So I lovingly stepped back. No dramatic exits, just slow fades and honest reflections.

And I reminded myself:

“Just because a relationship ends doesn’t mean it failed. Sometimes it served its purpose. Sometimes you outgrow it, and that’s okay.”

It brought a sense of peace and stillness—though sometimes, a familiar song will stir up the memories.

4. Recovery Group + Journaling + Memes = Healing Combo

Seriously, shoutout to Celebrate Recovery, my journal, and that one meme account that reminds me I’m not the only recovering codependent out here.

Humor has been essential in this process. When I look back at my behavior through a compassionate (and sometimes hilarious) lens, it helps me let go of shame and hold onto wisdom.

5. Rebuilding Myself Rebuilt My Relationships

At the end of the day, the most important relationship I repaired was the one with myself. When I stopped trying to rescue others, I finally had time to listen to me. My needs. My limits. My joy.

And guess what? The healthier I became, the healthier my relationships naturally got. Who knew?

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So if you’re on your own journey of untangling codependency, I see you. It’s not always easy, but it is so worth it. Keep going. Keep laughing. Keep growing.

I’d love to hear from you—have you had to repair or release a relationship on your own healing journey? What did you learn about yourself in the process?

• Week 16 – Blogging Challenge for Codependency Recovery:
  • Letting Go of Guilt and Shame: Reflect on how these feelings have influenced your choices.
• Week 16– Blogging Challenge for Advanced Codependency Recovery:
  • How I’ve Repaired Relationships Impacted by Codependency: Share lessons learned in repairing or ending relationships.

#CodependencyChallenge2025