Yelling, Yielding, Yearning Your yelling and my yielding Was a dance that fed my yearning For peace For love For happiness Which did not come My yelling and your yawning Was a dance that fueled my yielding For peace For love For happiness Which I found without you
Whew! This is challenge is almost over! I really struggled with this one! As I’m sure you already know, there are really not very many words beginning with the letter X. Well, there are only one and a half pages of X words out of 1342 in my Webster’s Dictionary so I had to get... Continue Reading →
A whole lot of V's In the beginning… I was a victim to the villains who vanquished my life. I was vulnerable to the vague validation I desperately valued to fill the void within my heart. I lived a vicarious life vexed with vainglorious attempts to validate you. In the end… I found value in... Continue Reading →
Unworthy, Unhealthy, Unattainable, Unhinged I have spent most of my life feeling unworthy; unworthy of love, unworthy of happiness, unworthy of peace... My unhealthy thoughts and behaviors and a total lack of self-respect fueled this unworthiness. And because I was so unhealthy, I unconsciously perpetrated unattainable expectation on myself and others. I wanted to be... Continue Reading →
Trust, Teased, Tiresome, Tired Trust - We are born with an innate ability to trust and as we grow, we develop a sense of who we can or cannot trust based on our life experiences. Somehow along the way, my trust sensor broke. I blame it on my lack of self-esteem from a very young... Continue Reading →
Rebound, Reliable Rebound - Going from one relationship to the next right away to avoid the pain of a breakup. One way I dealt with my feeling of hurt and betrayal was to rebound to the next relationship. So basically, I didn’t deal with them. For some reason, I could not be alone. Having someone,... Continue Reading →
Quiet, Quest, Questions I was quiet about my quest My quest to find love My quest to find peace My quest to find happiness My quest to find acceptance Too quiet I shut out that still small voice I did not ask questions Questions that would guide me Questions that would protect me Questions that... Continue Reading →
Pusillanimous, Passive Aggressive I had an album when I was a teenager by the Rutles. I don’t remember where it came from but there was one song that always stuck with me, or should I say, one line from one song that always stuck with me; “You're so pusillanimous, oh yeah." I remember looking up... Continue Reading →
Manipulation, Minimize, Mask Do you realize that codependents are masters of manipulation? I had no idea! Let me tell you, learning that was like a blow to the gut. I did not like hearing that I was a manipulator (to control or play upon by artful, unfair, or insidious means especially to one's own advantage) but... Continue Reading →
Loathed, Lacked, Lost For me there is a great distinction between hate and loathe. I hate a lot of things and have even claimed to have hated some people from time to time (though I do not hang on to that burden long) but loathe is something all together different to me. Loathe is a... Continue Reading →
Hurt, Hurting, Hurts Twelve years ago I could not tell you what "hurt" me outside of what was physically, mentally and emotionally going on in my world at that moment. And at that moment I was hurt by the lying and cheating. I was hurt by the unending manipulation. I was hurt by the palm... Continue Reading →
Gullible, Guilt I use to be so gullible; I believed just about anything anyone would tell me. If Chicken Little would have told me, "the sky is falling", I would have been right there with him, running in circles and trying to save everyone. Somehow I believed that I was needed, wanted and loved based on... Continue Reading →
Journey On Strong 