The Narcissist-Codependent Dance

I was stuck in this dance for many, many years but found the help I needed to get off and stay off the “dance floor”. Thank you Dr. Jenner for this post!

Dr Nicholas Jenner's avatarSafe Harbour Therapy and Counselling

Among my patient group (and circle of friends), there are people who continually allow others to take advantage of them, continue to give and stay in very toxic relationships. They attempt to make themselves indispensable for their partners (and everyone else) and become the local and family martyr. They are the codependents who keep on giving. It is also very often the case that these people are either in or have been in a relationship with someone who has narcissist tendencies. In fact there are studies that suggest that they might even seek out such types.

There is a dance in codependency that involves the intimate relationship between codependents and narcissistic types. Codependents lack a healthy relationship with self. They are prone to put others first before their own needs. This is unhealthy.

Narcissists also have an unhealthy relationship with self. They put themselves above all else. They use others…

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