Inside Out Challenge – Day 3

The longest night you ever spent Being the people-pleasing, under achieving, no self-esteeming, flaming codependent that I was, I have countless long nights in my history. Each one of them brought on by my own poor choices and devastating consequences. However, since I am to write about the "longest night", I will write about the... Continue Reading →

Inside Out Challenge – Day 2

Your biggest fear about growing old I've never had any fears of growing old. I actually look forward to it. I want to see my grandchildren get married and I want to be around to hold and love on my great-grandchildren. There is so much to look forward to that I'm almost, dare I say,... Continue Reading →

Book Review: Conquering Shame and Codependency — Bad Cat Ink

This is a wonderfully written review of the book, Conquering Shame and Codependency, by blogger Melody Daggerhart of Bad Cat Ink. Book: Conquering Shame and Codependency Series: Author: Darlene Lancer Genres: non-fiction, self-help, psychology, codependency Synopsis (from Amazon book page): A nationally recognized author, speaker and codependency expert examines the roots of shame and its connection with... Continue Reading →

Nothing Changes If Nothing Changes

It has been almost four years since I wrote this post and it just amazes me how different my life is these days. Change can be hard and certainly scary but change is hope. Don't give up! How many times have you heard the saying, “Nothing changes if nothing changes”? How about the definition of... Continue Reading →

Have you lost your joy?

I recently had a conversation with a friend of mine who, I feel, has lost her joy. I say this because I remember when I lost mine. I remember just how I felt, how I acted and where I ended up. Joy vs. Happiness Joy and happiness are wonderful feelings to experience, but are very... Continue Reading →

Self Care: An Alien Concept To Codependents But An Essential Process

It is an alien concept and really uncomfortable at first but life changes when we do it!

FREE FROM CODEPENDENCY

selfloveFor anyone with codependent tendencies, self care is not a concept that comes easy.  Used to giving and not receiving, it can be difficult to turn that attention inward when needed. It is generally needed at all times, however in the process of recovery from narcissist abuse, it is essential. In therapy, it is something I try to encourage as much as possible  and help clients realise that it is more than just making themselves feel good. Healthy self care is not about escaping and distraction. It is not about impulsive behavior based on self pity.  It is about the basics and more.  If we look at the basics first:

Stephen R Covey wrote: “Feeling good doesn’t just happen.  Living a life in balance means taking the necessary time to renew yourself. It’s all up to you. You can renew yourself through relaxation. Or you can totally burn yourself out…

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No Need To Explain Myself

Updated... I wrestled with myself a little last week... I received an email from Kindle Direct Publishing for my ex's father's account. At one point, a few years ago, I was helping him edit and self-publish his books. I kept telling him I was not a literary agent nor an editor but he wanted my... Continue Reading →

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